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I love you, but you do not need

We live in a society in which every day we create new needs. We love the formula "need": " I need to change my car, I need new shoes, need another mobile, need to join a gym", etc.

If we think consumerism around us, this may be understandable; many are interested to think so, but that does not justify it. But it is worse when transfer these ideas to the framework of relations, and more specifically to relationships.

I love you, but you do not need

If you are someone you love the songs that say phrases like "my life are you", "without you I am nothing" or "I 'll die if you're not , " if you melt every time your partner tells you "are everything to me "or" I could not live without you "is very likely to become part of those people who make their relationship the center of her life , forgetting even your life is something else.

Love is freedom, not suffering

We often hear phrases like "I need to be with him all the time", "would do anything for her," "if you leave me I die."

Have you ever wondered what lies behind such statements? Perhaps a dependency relationship, perhaps a loss of identity , perhaps a fear of losing the other person. Such statements indicate that behind there is an unhealthy relationship.

The psychologist Walter Riso said in one of his books that love creates a bond that can be converted to string when there is no freedom . For a relationship to be healthy, both must be clear to be with that person is an option, not a necessity.Instead of saying "I can not be without you" is much nicer though we acostumbrados- not say, "I could be without you and be happy; I still choose to be with you because I want you to be part of my happiness ", or what is the same:" I love you, but you do not need. "For a long time we have been inculcated in love suffer is inevitable, and that, from my point of view, is false.

From the moment you're going wrong it is no longer love, at least for those who understand that love is synonymous with well-being, fullness, unconditional surrender, respect, support, and especially freedom.

Couples who go of wanting to be supported, people who endure or tolerate situations that go against their principles, who allow disrespect or emotional blackmail do not because they want their partners, but because they do not want themselves.

No one is indispensable

Many people who self-deluded into thinking they need the other, actually live ensconced in routines that do not meet them because they believe that, to quit, they would never find love.

Needing implies that something is imperative that we can not live without it. Needing involves depend, and dependence leads us away from freedom .

There are many examples that illustrate the idea that, like it or not, no one is indispensable. People are separated and start new relationships, some people suffer the loss of a loved one and move on, even ourselves someday not be here and life will continue.

Keep in mind the idea that nothing is forever and know give up what does not suit us helps us to value people who are part of our life and maintain healthier relationships based on choice of what we want, not conformism based on the lack of options.

The couple is a part, not a whole

Often people fall into the trap of understanding their relationship as a whole: "She is what gives meaning to my life" ... And very romantic as this may sound to us, it is one of the worst mistakes that can be commit.

We can not leave the meaning of our life, or what is the same, our happiness in someone else's hands, however much we want.The person we choose to share our life is an important being, of course yes; but it can not be all.

Our lives as individuals complete with more. And we should devote some time to our own growth as people.

Our emotional autonomy and our goals in life are parts we can not ignore.

One can not help being who he is, can not lose its essence and identity to satisfy your partner. If so, we are fed a morbid love , a toxic relationship based on fears and obsessions.

Do not forget that love is no need : love is love in freedom , want is to choose, and love someone is to choose that person every day without relying on it .
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Item Reviewed: I love you, but you do not need Description: We live in a society in which every day we create new needs. We love the formula "need": " I need to change my car, I need new shoes, need another mobile, need to join a gym", etc. Rating: 5 Reviewed By: saikiran shakewar
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